Crazy Talk

Yes, this post is going to be a LONG vent session. So if you're not interested in listening reading, then I suggest you close your browser and move on.

I am going CRAZY!

It could be that I feel trapped in this town. People keep saying that it's so great here, but I have yet to experience the greatness. I have even been getting out there! Some nice girls in my area invited me over to hang out with them while our kids played. They were super nice, and it was great for Brenika to run around with some girls her age and get her wiggles out. The people I have met here are really nice. I even made dinner for one of the girls in my ward that just had a baby. Service always makes you feel better, right? Meh. I still am crazy.

It could be the wind. Have I mentioned how windy it is? Oh the wind. It's enough to drive anyone crazy. All day and ALL NIGHT. I'm surprised we still have a roof and trees. It really is that bad. There is no sarcasm going on right now. Wind. I hate you.

I miss my job. Now that Dirk is getting older, I realize how absolutely WONDERFUL it was to get away 4 nights a week and just clean. It is now dawning on me that I will NEVVVVVVVVER be able to do that again. The nearest temple to me is 2 hours away. I miss talking to Angie and Wendy. I miss the volunteers and even the cute old men and ladies that volunteer to clean and can barely walk around. I even miss when no one would show up and we'd have to clean the entire temple by ourselves. I miss our late night snacks (though they have completely ruined my body) and our late night chats. I miss the 20 min drive with no traffic and time to clear my head. I miss that ever so needed break from my family. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely ADORE my children and husband. You know what I mean.

I miss my dog. On Ellen the other day she had a dog on her show that was in a recent movie. It was doing all sorts of tricks. The EXACT.SAME.TRICKS. that Britney does. Bang, spin, roll over. I got all teary and sad. This is the LONGEST I have ever been without my dog. A few weeks is fine. A few months??? Not fine.

I miss Dallis. I miss Lily. I miss Brette. I miss Monica. I miss Kristi. I miss Danica. Phone/Text/Skype is just NOT the same. It helps though. I would die if it wasn't available.

I am in DESPERATE need of some Red Mango. There is nothing out there like it. Whoever created that place is like my ultimate hero. I love them even more than Britney Spears. Okay?? Ice Cream kills Dirk. Oh how I long for some Red Mango. I wish I could text up Ashlee and Emilee and bond over the deliciousness in my mouth.

The other night I didn't want to cook. (Which I actually enjoy doing now... shocker.) I just wanted some normal take out. No, NOT fast food. I hate fast food and have hated it for over 10 years now. I will eat it on vacation because I know that it's just not feasible on the pocket book to eat at nicer restaurants. But, I just wanted something normal. Cafe Rio? Panda Express? Wingers? Ihop? WHERE IS THE CIVILIZATION PEOPLE.

I need some craft supplies. I asked my Relief Society presidency where to get some when they came over. They pretty much said Walmart is your best bet. Really. Walmart. The go to store. It is NOT my go to store. I hate walmart. There, I said it. I hate it. Do I seriously have to order something online that would cost me less than a dollar at a craft store? An.noy.ing.

Oh the humanity of living in a small town. I'm SURE I will get used to it. I'm SURE I will grow to love it like everyone keeps telling me. I'm SURE it'll be fine and dandy in a few years. But for now, let me tell you about how awful awesome it is. HA... HAHAHA

And now that I'm done whining, I will say, that YES there are worse things that could happen to me. My cousin is currently waiting to see if her husband will wake up after a medically induced coma because his heart randomly stopped. She's only 35. My child could have died in a horrific car accident. Cancer could diagnose someone in my family at any time. There are worse things than living a small town... this I know. I will end my pity party and get over it.